March 2026 updates

March came and went. Haley moved out with Blake. She left on the 14th and made her way to California, then across the country to Florida. It's weird not having her here, and I think she'll be back in the future, but for now, time for her to see what life has to offer.

We're adjusting to the empty nest thing. Plenty to keep us occupied and busy, the house is just a little quieter. Kody is same old, same old. I'm sure he misses her, but nothing phases this guy.

Riley just found out Hannah got accepted to grad school in Cincinnati and his plan is to follow her out there, I think. He's gonna graduate in May, so we have to figure out going to GJ to see him and celebrate the accomplishment.

Marci is still plugging away at school. Things are going there, I suppose, but it may be time to switch it up in the future. Will leave it at that for now. Hopefully having a master's degree helps.

About a month ago, as I was heading to rehearse with Greg Hoy at Dave Hill's house, Michael Paolantonio reached out to me, asking if I was interested in playing in his wife's new Cake cover band. I knew nothing about it or what she was planning, so I wanted to hear more about it. I do like the Cake hits, but beyond those, I didn't know much about the band.

I talked to Michael and found out that his wife, Cyana, via her theater contacts, had lined up some players I knew. On guitar was Justin Davis. I know him via socials and know he plays with Strong Suit, among others. My main memory of him was once Kathy Moore told me that as Stereo Embers was breaking up, that someone was gonna get a monster of a bass player.

She also had Ric Pentilla on trumpet and keys, who I have hung with at shows, as well as playing with him in Greg's band last month. He's cool and we like each other. On drums was a guy I don't know, and she recruited Jeremy Lightfoot to play bass. But she said he was super busy and she grabbed another guy named Mark. After she set lineup, she said she originally wanted me but thought I was in three bands, so didn't pursue too much.

Anyway, Brett and I went to check her band, Cupcake, out last week at their inaugural show at the Skylark. I figured with all these dudes, they'd be pretty good. I was not wrong. During soundcheck, it was clear that they were gonna be good. They played a great set and everyone was solid. Cy, however, was outstanding. Her stage chops definitely showed and she had great energy and stage presence. She could sing as well and it all just worked.

I had talked to her earlier in the week and we decided I should be on the roster, whether as a full-time member, or a rotating bass, since all the players have other bands as well. She's got some gigs booked in early June, one at Pono Ranch and one at the Blue Moon. I'll have back-to-back, as I'm booked for the Blue Moon, and then the next night at Conor Byrne.

Overall, been working on the Cake tunes and they are quirky. The parts are easy, it's the song arrangements that are what I need to remember. I've been working on them and they'll be fine. Looking forward to getting in a room with those guys and see how it goes.

*edit to add

forgot to mention that Planets had a record release scheduled at the Sleight of Hand with our friends Braly Sangster. We were all set to go for 3/13, with a surprise addition of Tim on a few Embers songs to round things out. We had a bunch of people committed to go, with about 20-25 people that I directly influenced. And then the week of the gig, Robb started feeling gross and come Thursday, he made the decision to call it, so we had to do a bunch of texting and messaging, telling people the bad news. It was a big bummer, to say the least.

As of now, April 4th, we still have not rescheduled and I don't think we're going to. It seems Trey either has better things to do or he's just super busy. I don't know at this point. It's all sort of annoying. Our next gig isn't until May 2nd at Conor Byrne, so at least there's that, but any record release is still up in the air at the moment.

4/12/25, 52 year in review

I literally can't remember what I did for my birthday last year, but for this year, Haley came down from Western to visit. So that's a good start. But that wasn't until afternoon.

I got up and had breakfast. Austin had brought cinnamon rolls from the bakery in Bothell, so I had a bunch to bring home. Good news is there was treats. Bad news is I'm the only one who eats gluten, so it's a bit much for one dude. Still, I'll take it.

Opened some gifts (orange OR hat that matches my green and white ones; that was returned later in the day for an REI smaller hat for running. A James pocketknife, some Marine Layer socks, cash from Judy, a weird snapback Mariners hat from Riley) and ate some food. After that, I had said I wanted to go test drive cars, but I'm sort of putting that off. Would be cool to talk to an "expert" in EVs (eg: salesperson) and learn stuff, but I didn't feel like it. Instead, I tried to super glue a small pot of Marci's I had broken. When I realized I couldn't, I looked at the maker's mark, then realized it was up in Snohomish, so off to Snohomish we went.

40 minutes or so later, we arrived at the pottery store. Haley bought the pot for Marci last year, but it wasn't from there, but one of their resellers. We browsed around and Marci got a new mug, an orchid pot and I got her a new pot to replace the one I accidentally broke.

We reparked and walked up and down the main drag in Snohomish. Pretty enough little strip, very similar to Grand Junction. Lots of antique stores and restaurants. My bro Taylor H. suggested a place called Grilla Bites, that had a lot of GF options. Marci and I both got turkey sandwiches and then walked around some more, before getting some ice cream before heading home.

2023 year in review

It's been an interesting year. Then again, aren't they all?

Most importantly, we are all healthy and relatively happy and everyone still speaks to each other, for the most part. As I type, Marci is in the kitchen getting dinner ready; Riley is at Target, working until about 7; Haley is downstairs with her "friend" John; Kody is on his bed snoozing; I am on the couch typing this up and watching the Packers vs Vikings.

For me, it's been a meh year professionally. Job ended in January with Amazon as my contract was up. I knew that was the case as that was what I accepted. What I didn't realize was that after my job ended, the bottom fell out of the tech industry and 1000s of people lost their jobs all over the country. I figured I'd be able to find a job, but with the economy in the toilet and everyone on a hiring freeze, that became difficult.

As a result, it was back to unemployment for the second time in my life. Unless I count a week in 2019 when we were asked by Atos to take a week off for something, in which case, it would be my third time. But, I digress.

Thankfully, I got unemployment and that helped us to get by. But the trouble was, I couldn't get a callback or an interview. I had plenty of connections, but no one was hiring. I had a little thing going on the side and considered starting a business, but I didn't and I just did some odd jobs here and there to help out.

Through the job drought, I kept it up with bass in Planets and the Sunset Grooves. Kathy dialed me up, but only once for the year; her SPT seems to not be gigging out as much anymore. Planets did 7 gigs, Sunsets did 10, and then my sideman gig with Forest Ray did 12 over the span of 2 weeks through Oregon and California. Despite playing 31 gigs, I would like to do more.

Come May/June, I got a call to go back to work, but also was able to finesse that road trip with Forest Ray. Though I had a bunch of fun with those guys, I don't know if I'd do it again, at least not under those circumstances. Maybe a shorter tour, or if there were lodging and food guarantees in place, but I definitely understand the situation better now. I was hoping it would open things up network-wise, but so far, nada. Which is fine; I love the 2 bands I'm in now and hope I can get more gigs with them in 2024.

In early June, Marci and I visited Haley up in Bellingham. We basically spent one night there, having an AirBnB gift card that we used to book a place. That was a fun getaway and nice to see Haley there doing her thing. We had only seen her in Bellingham in January when we dropped her off to start school. As far as I can tell, she seems to be thriving a bit there, compared to her experience at Concordia. She lived in the dorm for the first part of the year and had a roommate that seemed pretty cool. She came home for the summer and worked at the Coal Creek Y and had some HR drama there, which was super lame, but she seemed to get through that OK enough. She's now renting a place up there with 4 or 5 other girls, and seems to get along with all of them.

Add in this John guy, and she's growing up a bit. Though Hay hasn't told us that they're dating, it sure seems like they are. He's been here 2-3 times this week and she's spent the night at his place a few times as well. But, as with all things Hay, we pretty much need to let her come to us; asking her could put us in a bad position, as lame as that is. She does come to us for help with finances, as challenging as that is for all of us, but we try our best to help her out.

Riley has gotten in his groove at Colorado Mesa. He's doing well with his double major, with Tech Drama and something else, I forget. He seems to be a guy that the professors are investing time and energy with, sort of like the teachers did at NHS. He has his car at school and though that's helpful to him, it's gonna be a pain in May when I have to fly out there and help him drive it back. Better start saving now!

He and Claire are still together and she's been over on the regular as well. They're both working at Target again. Riley gets a lot of love from Target; they appreciate his hustle and leadership. Don't think he has a career in retail but I love that he's learning so much there. He's got a few more weeks here until he goes back to CMU. Hopefully the money he's making helps to carry him through the rest of the school year. He has taken out a loan for school, which sucks, but it is what it is now.

Marci is carrying the house these days. She's teaching like a beast and picking up a couple hours here and there doing tutoring, including our backdoor neighbor's kid, George. I wish we were in a position where she didn't have to work (or at least go to work), and could just be at home and do her thing, but until I can uplevel my career, this is her lot in life, I guess. :/

With the kids out of the house most days now, I feel like Marci and I are stronger than ever. I realized that when the kids are here, I have an "audience" and do act a little differently, and sometimes joke a bit too much at her expense. At the same time, I feel like I'm the one that tries to learn and evolve, where she sort of just goes along, without trying to grow. I don't know who is right or wrong, but it doesn't matter too much. We are good most of the time and I'm happy with that.

I don't know if there's much else to add here without getting too specific about anything. I guess it boils down to my usual response when someone asks me how we are doing. I always say that I can't complain, for the reasons I mentioned above (healthy, happy, etc). If the main drama in my life is the need to find a job, well, I'll take it.

Speaking of jobs, I have a hot lead again at Microsoft, possibly for my old role. Last year at this time, I was talking to those dudes and it was positive. They all agreed they'd like to have me back, but I was a "nice to have" not a "need to have," and they had no budget to make it happen. This year, I am a business need, but it's still under discussion and seeing about budget. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and have a good feeling. Hopefully by this time in January, we are green lit and I am either working or starting work again.

And rather than make this any longer than it already is, I think I'll stop here, start different entries for other stuff. To sum it up, another year in the books, things are good, let's have more of the same.

Gig report: 9/30/23 Sunset Grooves at the Bite of Broadview

I love the back-to-back gigs and I also hate them. I love 'em because I get to play music. Nothing I'd rather do. I hate them because of the waiting around and the commute and the getting home tired, etc. But I am not complaining. It's what players like me strive for.

This year, I had Planets on Friday, 9/29. Then I had Sunset Grooves on Saturday, 9/30. Looking back, same thing happened last year, with Planets on 9/23, and then SGs on 9/24. Good times.

This gig was my second time playing the Bite of Broadview, the third time overall for the Sunset Grooves (last year's write up is here: BOB 2022. For some reason, I thought it was quite chilly last year and in reading through the recap quickly, apparently it was 70° but ended up cooling off. This year, we are getting another bit of an Indian summer, and it was in the high 60's, with an expected cool off after the sun went down.

Earlier in the day, Dusty messaged the group chat with the suggestion that we go with a "70's denim vibe," which is cool, if you have "70's denim vibe" clothes, which I don't. I was planning on wearing my flamingo suit, since I'd be on a big stage and it might be cool out. But then I pivoted, going with the Canadian tuxedo look. I don't have cool vintage jeans, but just a pair of Levis and a jean jacket on top.

After spending all day troubleshooting, pulling out, shopping for, installing, and then troubleshooting a dishwasher, I didn't have much time to get ready. Luckily, it's getting to be second nature, so I packed up both L-1000s, packed up the pedalboard, grabbed the flamingo suit, shirt and white shoes, just in case, then headed out the door for the Shoreline area again.

Putting in the new dishwasher pre gig.

I got there and last year, next to the stage, there was a "green room," which consisted of a canopy and some tables. This year, nothing. Nowhere to put gear or hang out. Mainly concerned about putting a couple K worth of gear on the ground in the open, but I trusted in the goodness of others (it worked out).

Haley was meeting me there as she needed her SS card for a job she got in Bellingham. Though she's only been back at school for a week, anytime I get to see her, especially when it's at a gig, it's special. She showed up and we got to hang for a little bit. I got us some dinner at a food truck selling crepes (quite good) and got our grub on.

The kid and me.

Since this gig was up north and a lot of my crew lives up there, I asked people to come out. Cass drove out, Steve and Salena showed up, as did his mates Dan and Alan. We all got to catch up a bit and it was nice to have some support for a change.

Usually when we play out, we have to provide the PA and lights. For that reason, it's always super nice to play a gig where there's a stage, lights, PA and a sound guy. The band before us did classic rock and did it pretty well and they were sounding great out front. They did their thing and then we got setup and ready to go.

Stage with classic rock band.

One thing I love about the SG gig is that it encouraged me to try out stuff I otherwise would not have. I'm able to dress up, play a different pedal and also use IEMs. It does make the load in/load out a lot easier, but in a case like this gig, I did have to rely on the sound person to have my mix dialed in. My IEM receiver/transmitter also seems to be weird at times. I don't know if it's normal, or if my units have problems. I get some interference from time to time. Last night wasn't too bad, but I'd love a gig with no weird glitches.

Everything sounded pretty good otherwise, but I did have some issues with the bass being too loud, then the keyboards too quiet (and then too loud), and Jen's vocals being too loud. Easy enough for me to tell the sound guy to adjust, but still annoying when he wasn't getting it perfect. I ended up just dealing with what I had.

Getting announced by Mike the MC.

Set 1 with the Hog, set 2 with the Gold.

Another issue was that it was quite chilly on stage. My basses were all sharp due to the cold, my fingers kept sticking to the strings. Kept me from sweating, though, so there was a positive to it all. We powered through the first set and for me, I played pretty well. I got through my nemesis, "Brandy," without issues. Most songs ended up being fine. We took a quick break and then got back onstage but had to cut our set short due to a hard stop at 10pm. We ended up trimming out about 5 songs, but ended up having a great time anyway.

As mentioned, load out was easy and quick and I was home by 10:45.

Next up: Sunset Grooves at the Central.

June is here

Not sure why I've gotten lazy at blogging. I guess I just forget at times. Here are some updates, bullet-point style:

• Music
• Planets has a gig on Thursday, 6/8, our first return to the Sunset since our first show last year. With all the progress we've made, we still haven't made it over the hump yet. Robb has been prolific and we have about 12-13 songs to choose from, with more on the regular. This will be our last show until late July as Cass and fam will be in Spain for about 3 weeks after the show.
• Sunset Grooves is humming along. We got video footage from our last show and though it was decent, I'd say our weak spot is our backing vocals. We are pretty average at it and I don't know how to unlock it so that we're better. Maybe if we didn't dissect songs we already know on the regular? Is it IEM mixes? At that show, I had my vocals way up and Jen's way back, just for reference, and on my isolated channel, it still was off at times. I know for me, sometimes it's singing notes that are just at the top part of my range, so unless I'm on it, I'm usually off it. Dennis is proving to be a great guitarist and an average vocalist, like the rest of us. He is going to try leads on a couple songs, so we'll get to hear what he can do. I don't know if there are any tunes I could try, but if there is, I'd like to.
• Forest Ray is yet to get off the ground. I went to see them last week and was pleased that they are a little more animated live than on record. The drummer, Miles, also skews towards harder music, and it was clear when he played. I think it'll be fun to play with him. After the Planets show this week, it will free up Thursdays, so I hope to finally rehearse with them sometime in the next week or so. As far as the tunes go, I'm comfortable with about 8-9 tunes, which will be most nights. Though Peter did say there are a couple shows where we'll need two sets, which means I'll need to learn about 6-7 more tunes.
• Job
• Almost 2 weeks ago, Andrea from AWS reached out to me about a role. She is on the content team and I worked adjacent to her team last year. Her and I and someone else on the team, Marlee, all met on a call, and long story short, they need people to do some grunt work. Good thing I am not above grunt work! I met with their manager, Shawn, on Friday and pretty much had a job offered. As of now, nothing is official, but it is definitely on the table and I hope to know more this week. Good news is it will pay me double what I'm getting now, bad news is that it is likely over in mid to late December. But, knowing what I know now and how we can survive, I can likely put away $500-800/month until the end of the contract. And, I'll continue looking for a FTE role somewhere to get out of contract-land.
• Family
• Riley is home from CMU and enjoying his summer so far. It's weird having someone in the house now when I'm "working from home," but that's what summer is going to be now. Hay will be back next week and then they start working at the Y mid-June.
• Marci and I spent a quick 1.5 days in Bellingham last week, using up her PTO and an Airbnb gift card we had from Christmas. Stayed at a little converted garage over Bellingham Bay and slept in a crappy bed and listened to trains honk all night. Not a great night, but nice to get away.
• Anything else
• Finished Barry and Succession. Marci and I are now watching Taste the Nation on Hulu. I have one more episode to go in BCS before it's over. Do I start Breaking Bad again??
• I got 3 tickets for Raiders of the Lost Ark on the big screen on Wednesday. Marci and Riley are going and they both thought it was for Dial of Destiny. Oh well, sucks to be them. I hope DoD is good when it comes out at the end of the month! I have been not reading reviews and I'm hearing from some that it's great, from others that it's crap. Who knows??
• Playing lots of games on PC. I bought Ghost Recon: Breakpoint and Danny and I have been playing every few nights. It's a good time and a good way for he and I to stay connected. I also bought RDR2 for the PC and though I can't run it at full GFX, I can run high enough and it looks badass. Hoping I can slog my way through it this summer.

General updates

Work: still looking. Though I did speak with an old coworker last week. She was someone that was at MS, then went to Amazon and she reached out to me via LinkedIn. I was surprised to hear from her, but she gave me some great ideas. One of which was to join LinkedIn premium. It's $39.99/month but you get some perks and weirdly, since I did that, I've been getting some action, but still no jobs.

Yesterday, another former MS worker reached out to me and we chatted for a bit. His company is hiring and the role sounds totally like something I could do. It's 100% remote and a full-time gig and based on what he said, would pay me what I'm seeking. That would be cool; I've emailed his hiring managers but have yet to hear back.

And then, while I was on that call, my last manager texted me and asked if I was still looking, and then said a colleague of hers was gonna reach out to me to see if I'd want another contract with Amazon. I did see that he looked at my LI profile, but I have not heard from him yet.

Music: no gigs until May. Working on some new songs with PITO. Cool ones. Tried my new pedal with PITO and I think I'm gonna stay with my old rig for that band. It does work great with the SGs though, and that's been fun to get dialed in.

My guy Jim from Facebook has also reached out. Last year he messaged me out of the blue to play bass on a song that he submitted to some compilation by a band called the Pencils. That got great feedback and he loved what I did, so he asked me to do some recording on some tunes. I just got one guitar/drum/vocal track and I'm gonna try doing some recording today.

I also got double booked for 7/21 somehow. I got PITO booked at a place on Vashon, but then found out last week that SGs are looking to book that same date. With a nice fat payday for the band, I didn't want to jeopardize that, so I asked PITO if we could back out of that Vashon gig. Luckily they were really cool about it and said sure. Even though they were going to pay us $500 total + ferry tix to play, after staying overnight and paying for that, we'd likely each be losing money.

Books: Just finished Don Winslow's City of Dreams. Danny Ryan in California and it was great. Next up is City in Ruins, but that's not coming out until next year. :( So instead, I'm reading The Power of the Dog again. My notes indicate I've only read it once, but I swear this is my third time through it.

Gamez: Finished Hi-Fi Rush last night. What a great freakin' game. So awesome. Loved it, but some of the boss battles were tricky. Gorgeous art direction, great music, fantastic characters and levels and gameplay. 10/10. And now Star Wars Jedi: Survivor comes out in two days. The question is, do I buy it for PC or wait for it on GamePass? Jedi: Fallen Order runs OK on this PC; I have to dial down to 1920x1080, but it plays good enough. Hopefuly SWJS isn't too taxing, even on this beast of a computer.

Life: We celebrated Ted's one year passing on Sunday. Haley came home for her birthday on Sat and we went to dinner at Grillbird in W Seattle. Sunday, we met with my friend Steve, who took us out on a 26' sailboat in the wind to remember Ted. It was windy and cold, but so great. We spent the day in Ballard, enjoying the Farmer's Market, had lunch at the Matador, found out Hay was chased around Seattle by some mystery BMW, had some molten cakes, shopped at KAVU, and then headed home. It was a good day.

Alcohol and me

Speaking of Grand Junction, last week when we were there at the pizza joint, Marci got a hard cider. I, a non-drinker, asked for a sip and, it wasn't bad.

I don't drink/drink very very little because I am allergic to alcohol. My face turns red, I get hot, my heart pounds and generally I feel cruddy. So if and when I drink, I tend to drink very little, maybe once or twice a year. And only one drink at a time. Not beer, usually something sweet.

Anyway, the hard cider she had, I don't remember what it was, but it wasn't bad. I generally do not like the alcohol taste after swallowing, so not drinking also gives me that benefit.

Fast forward to the weekend we got home and we were grocery shopping. I figured, why not, let's pick up some hard cider. We got something with lemonade and guava and brought it home. That night, her and I split a 12oz can and it was not bad. It was hot out and the drink tasted nice enough. I didn't get a buzz or anything but I could feel my face get warm and my eyes feel tight (don't know how else to explain it).

A few nights later after dinner, I was settling down to watch the Mariners' game and figured I'd be ok having another can. Full one this time. I figured I had food in my stomach and things would be fine.

Little did I know that after drinking it like a soda (way too fast) that things would not be fine. I started feeling weird, my heart felt like it was pounding out of my chest, my head felt stuffy and fuzzy. No buzz, just felt physically gross. I laid down on the couch and tried to rest and it was tough. Heart pounding more than anything else. Soles of feet were itchy, too, I remember.

Anyway, eventually after an hour or so, it wore off. After looking at the box the cider came in, I realized the alcohol volume was 6.9%! No wonder my ass was kicked. That cider had more alcohol in it than I drink in a year.

Blah. Felt gross.

Then tonight, I figured I share one with Marci; that seems to be more my speed. Had it at dinner, polished it off and Haley said she wanted to try it. There were a few drops left, so I let her do it. Then she's all, "That's not so bad," which in my mind meant, "I've had worse," and we just sort of let it go.

After a few more minutes of internally trying not to freak out or anything, she came out and said that she'd done shots of vodka before, as well as had cider. I'll spare the details of how the vodka made her feel, but let's just say she didn't feel great.

It was cool to have an "adult" conversation with her, though, without either Marci or I freaking out. Nice that Hay trusted us to tell us about it. It was less of a confession and more of her sharing an experience.

I did go slightly Dad mode and told her to be wary of drinking stuff offered from strangers, but she seemed pretty aware of that sort of stuff. At least she didn't roll her eyes or get grumpy about it.

I think once these ciders are done, I'm also done with cider. I'll stick to water and pops and a sip here and there of other people's drinks.

Off to college

While I can still remember it, wanted to drop a recap of last week, when we took some time off to drop Riley off at college. Memory was never great, but it definitely ain't what it used to be... Let's rewind.

In high school, Riley fell in love with theater, both performing on stage and doing tech work behind the scenes, so scientifically, that meant using the following search terms in Google:

• good theater college near WA

Super complex, right? So that meant, over the past year and change we took Riley to visit Southern Oregon University in Ashland, OR; Central Washington University in Ellensburg, WA; Western Washington University in Bellingham, WA; and, of all places, Colorado Mesa University in Grand Junction, CO.

Rather than going through all the schools, let's cut to the chase. Riley ended up choosing CMU after he and I visited there this past April. Back then, we flew from Seattle to Denver (broncos country, let's ride [so dumb, thanks russ]), then drove 4 hours west to Grand Junction.

Having never been to Colorado, it was pretty cool, though I could've done without a 4 hour drive. Unfortunately, though there is a little regional airport in GJ, there are no direct flights from Seattle to GJ. Instead, one must fly from SEA to PHX to GJT, or to Denver, as we did. However, now that we've done the drive, we told Rye that if/when he wants to come home, he/we're gonna have to split the cost and pay the extra $$ to fly.

But, as usual, I digress.

Last week, Marci and Rye flew out first, then Haley and I followed on Wednesday. Originally I was going to drive to CA with Haley again, but due to her choosing not to return to Concordia, we ended up crashing Riley's goodbye party in GJ. Luckily, we had booked an Airbnb for them that had enough room for the 4 of us, so that worked out well.

After Hay and I arrived, we got situated at the Airbnb and went to (checks pictures 'cause I can't remember), ah yes, dinner, at a local pizza place called Pablo's Pizza. The girls got their gluten free on and Riley was pleased to learn they offer student discounted special for CMU kids.

Airbnb room for the kids

Wide angle pix are weird

I got to take a run the next morning. Having been to GJ in April, I remembered the layout a bit. We stayed just north of their downtown area. Think of Old Bellevue, only bigger. The main street, called Main Street, runs east-west and many of their shops and restaurants are right there. Just south of there is the Colorado River and then beyond that, who knows; we never ventured that far. But on my run, I got to the river and ran down it for a bit before heading back for our big day of college shopping.

First thing I saw was a tipped over car

Cool Little Free Library

Unsure why this Land Cruiser is parked up there, but it is

The rest of the day, we spent going back and from the school to stores to prep Riley's dorm. His room is on the 5th floor of his dorm (top floor!), and is in a suite format. Main door opens to a small shared hallway, off of which are two separate dorm rooms. At one end of the hall is a bathroom counter/sink/mirror, and off the side of that is the shower/toilet. Four students get to share that with two students per room.

We loaded up our rental car with what Marci and Riley had picked up already and got moving to his dorm. The school had a bunch of other kids there helping with the move in. We all grabbed stuff and then got on the world's slowest elevator up to the 5th floor. Evidently this building's elevator is notorious for being slow and has a bad reputation because of it. Because I'm a dad, I timed a trip down and it took 3.5 minutes. The kids said sometimes it stops at every floor even if no one presses the buttons. Maybe it's haunted.

Sometime on one of these days, we met Riley's roommate Justin. We had heard he was from Namibia but moved to the US a few years ago. He was a strapping young lad, blond haired, blue eyed and super polite and friendly. I'm excited for Riley to get to know this guy and vice versa. They appear to be a good fit.

While we were in GJ, despite having an Airbnb with a kitchen and the ability to buy food to prepare there, we ate out SO MUCH. In fact, the whole time we were there, I think we ate in the house one time. The rest of the meals were out and about. Part of me was horrified (there goes my budget), but part of me was thankful that we were able to just enjoy and not worry too much about it. As I get older, I am starting to justify spending $$ instead of having it just to have it. I attempt to remain judicious with important stuff, but I'm trying to balance more around experiences and events. After all, if we have more $$ and choose not to utilize it to enrich our lives and experiences, then why have it?

The rest of our time in GJ was spent just hanging around and making sure we set Riley up as much as possible to be on his own. We ended up getting him a bike and took him out to brunch on Saturday for his 18th birthday. Haley spent a lot of time with Riley meeting his new friends, it was pretty cool. Marci and I took some time to walk around GJ and did what empty nesters do: visit antique shops. We also, without Riley, got to drive through the Colorado National Monument. That was wicked and cool and confirmed that I still hate heights.

Test riding a used bike

After purchasing said used bike

Haley was too close to the edge for my comfort

Instagram's version of BeReal

Pins found at an antique shop, did not buy

Figurines found at antique shop, did not buy

We finally left Saturday afternoon, for a quick 30 minute flight to Denver, then a 2.5hr flight back home to Seattle. Before leaving, of course, we said our goodbyes to Riley. Me and Haley made it through ok but Marci was pretty sad. She's had a rough year with a lot of transitions and changes, plus, now she's losing her baby boy to young man-hood. But she was able to tough it out after some tears and we got home in one piece.

Now, a week later, we haven't really caught up to Riley yet. At least Marci and I haven't. Hay talks to him on daily basis. I've been texting pictures of Kody and about the Mariners games (he finally is understanding and enjoying baseball: thank you J-Rod!). He's been super busy with first week stuff and meeting people and going to classes and auditioning for things. He's also not the best conversationalist with Marci and I, but we'll force some words out of him.

For now, it's dinner time and we'll call him later to see what's up.

Go Mavs!

One week before crazy time

 A week from today I'll be in Washington DC for work. Two weeks from today, I'll be in California, starting a drive home with Haley. Sort of cool for these things to be happening, but truth be told, I'll be more excited come June 1, when I'm home for a bit, before the next trip, later in June.

When I took the job in late January, I knew there would be travel involved. I think I was told 10% travel, which, at the time, I thought, "no big deal!" And, really, it isn't. But I'm terribly not excited about airports and planes and with two new bands getting off the ground (and other projects happening), it's sort of rough to get a rehearsal or two going, just to have to put a pin in it for a week while I'm gone.

Add in the fact that Ted passed away and that complicates things as well, but there's not much we can do to accommodate for that other than to live through it.

But this Saturday, I fly out at 8:30am on a direct flight from Seatac to DC. Then Sunday morning at 8:00am, I report to duty for testing at the convention center. Monday through Wednesday are event support days and though they'll be long, they'll go quick and I'll learn a ton. Thursday is a travel day and I'll be flying from DC to Dallas, then Dallas to Palm Springs, where Judy will pick me up. I'll stay there until Saturday, when I drive to San Clemente to meet the rest of the fam. We'll do Ted's memorial that night with family and then Sunday or Monday, Haley and I drive home.

Speaking of which, I need to look into places to stay on our way back. Ugh. Half of the dislike of travel is the logistics of everything. Where will you stay? When will you leave? What kind of flights are there? Will you Uber or rent a car? And all the time, I keep seeing $$$.

For work, at least they reimburse me. I just got a new CC ONLY for work. My last trip, the expenses were $1800 or so and 24Seven paid me back the week I claimed, so that went straight back to the card I was using. Only we weren't getting much reward back on that, so I opened a Chase Sapphire Preferred card which gives us a good amount of benefits for using it.

If and once I get converted to FTE, I'll get a corporate card to book everything to, so that's something to look forward to. However, the travel appears to increase quite a bit, so that's something to consider as well.

Updates and thoughts

Lot of music the past week or so. Took the Tbird to SE practice last week and really liked how it sounded. Neck dive for sure, but I could deal with it as when I'm playing, my hands are on the neck, duh! But overall, the tone was clear and would ring. The huge headstock was a little awkward, though, especially with something next to my amp. Once I moved it, though, we were good to go.

Then it was off to SG practice last Sunday night. The instrument parts are coming along nicely. Ilya, the new guitarist, is a metal (?) guy at heart but he is just a great player overall and is learning the parts like a pro. Would love to get some vocal harmony tips, but I'm working on watching YT videos and trying to hear the parts in all these classic songs.

Monday was SE again, since we have a gig this Saturday. Played through all the oldies and they are what they are. Crowd pleasers, but wish we would have evolved or brought new tunes. I get it, though. Despite that, the songs sounded really good. But now that I think about it, I actually brought the Tbird on Monday. I don't think we actually got together on last Thursday... but, I digress.

Marci is off at Ted & Judy's this week, her second visit this year. The in-laws are having a tough go these days, not feeling great and not willing to seek support locally. So that means Marci and Alison have been taking turns visiting them. It's good to get the help, but it can be a strain on our resources, etc. But I understand their reluctance to seek help from people they don't know.

Haley has been running in some track events finally and is doing really well, to me. She'd prefer better times and finishes, but I think she has really evolved mentally. It makes me so happy to hear her accepting where she's at, and wanting to get better, and knowing it's a process, instead of beating herself up and self-sabotaging. She is maturing and I'm here for all of it.

Last night was SE practice again and, again, like a comfy pair of shoes. Always like playing the songs and hearing the same old observations and stories over and over again. :D Comes with the territory, I guess.

Really looking forward to the next show, but with C19 rearing its ugly head again, hoping the show goes off without a hitch or people deciding not to show up. Infections seem to be increasing as people are pretty much maskless these days (myself included; went out for a work thing the other night and had a mask but didn't wear it).

Tonight should be a blast though. Will be bringing the L1k and the Tbird to spice things up. Steve R came over yesterday and we had a cool hang and gear geek out. He redid my pedal board so from R-L it goes Compressor, Tuner, OD and DI, swapping the places of the OD and DI. In doing so, having the overdriven signal first allows the DI to then EQ that sound, allowing the signal to be fuller. Duh. Unsure why I didn't think of that but it really does work.

Oh yeah, I also turn 50 next week. And travel to Colorado. It's gonna be busy and exciting and maybe I'll do a mid-life recap sometime.

Concussions: they run in the family!

Riley fell down in PE last week and came home complaining of a headache. Fast forward to Saturday and Marci's Mother's Intuition and a trip to the doctor and the official diagnosis was a mild concussion.

I guess in flag football or capture the flag or simple flag raising ceremony, Riley got bumped, fell down and somehow knocked his head on the ground. I, of course, see this as a teaching moment and told him when he falls, to tuck and roll, not simply land on his head.

The suggestions for recovery from concussion are to rest, not stimulate yourself with electronics (tv, tablets, phones, etc) and to take it easy.

Have you ever tried telling an 11 year old boy to "take it easy?"

You'd think we'd have learned our lesson from last year when Haley was playing flag football or capture the flag or something flag-related and took a dive and got herself a concussion also!

Same recommendations for her, but her knock was a little more serious. Though we tried to get her to to go to school, she ended up staying home for a few days and missing some friends' birthday parties as a result.

For now, Riley tried going to school today. I guess he was feeling pretty good this morning, but ended up calling me around 10:30. Luckily I took the day off and he's home now, in his darkened bedroom, listening to an audiobook and taking it easy.

Marci and I have both had concussions as well, in our mid-teen years, but both from car accidents, none of this falling down BS.

Here's hoping Riley feels better soon.

Bubble tea

Bubble tea is an obsession I share with Haley. Marci and Riley like it ok, but Hay and I are always looking for excuses to get some bubble tea.

Haley: It's Tuesday!
Me: I guess that means bubble tea!

Haley: I had band today and Mr. B wants me to try out for All-City.
Me: I guess that means bubble tea!

Marci: Dinner!
Me and Haley: We guess that means bubble tea!

So for Hay's birthday last month, I thought it would be cool to get her some goodies to make bubble tea at home! I visited Seafood City at Southcenter and there were some packets where you just add water and, poof! Instant bubble tea!

Well, I thought that's all you needed. Turns out, you need to buy the bubbles separately.

Anyway, after getting all the supplies, Haley made me some one afternoon. The mix I bought was black tea and though I liked it, she didn't like the "caffeine" taste to it (caffeine has a taste??). But she was happy to boil a cup of bubbles and mix them into a fruit smoothie.

Also, did you know that one cup of bubbles will supply about 2.5 beverages? Either that, or we need to figure out the perfect recipe ratio for bubbles to drinks.

Yesterday we went to a local Asian market, over next to Goodwill in the Overlake area. I actually think it's called Local Asian Market, but I could be wrong. There are fewer places where I can feel Most Asian or Least Asian than a local Asian market. I can't read a dang thing on the signs or posters, but I can flirt with the elderly check-out ladies in their native tongue. I think it throws them for a loop.

I walk in with my white woman and my mixed kids and then start dropping Mandarin dimes all over the place. The check-out ladies are almost always impressed with the broken Chinese coming from my mouth.

Once we got home, Hay got to work. She boiled up some boba and drizzled honey all over them (evidently you do that, or the boba just taste like nothing), which I didn't know and once she told me, it made all sorts of sense because, you know, they sort of do taste like honey!

After our 2 beverages, we had a scoop or two of boba left over. We ended up putting them in the fridge and figured we'd use them in later days.

I ended up using them just now. Though tasty, their bouncy texture was gone and the experience wasn't as satisfying as I would have liked. However, I chalk it up to a lesson learned.

Pro tip: don't save the boba. Use it all! It's just better that way.

Happy Monday

Wow! It's almost been a week since my last update! I'm sorry to say... I'm back!

Anyway, our bathroom is fixed. Turns out that when the shower install was done, they somehow cracked the S-trap underneath the drain. Luckily that drain is directly over the garage and another part of the house. After that was fixed, all is good. I spent a few hours priming and painting the bathroom yesterday and it's looking pretty spiffy. Now we just need to get the toilet and vanity replaced and we'll be all done!

I got to have some Riley time by myself on Saturday and it was fun. We hit the mall to run some errands and play and just do things he wanted to do. He got a little Hot Wheels car from McDonalds and enjoyed crashing that into everything in the mall. He's a fun little dude.

Haley's kind of come around too. I think what Marci hit onto is to keep Haley with food in her hands. We think Haley is going through a growth spurt. Her pants are all getting too short for her. I put Marci on a clothes buying moratorium until Haley stops growing. As long as Hay eats, she's in pretty good spirits, so we'll have a chubby Haley, but a happy Haley.

Music is starting to come around again. I have a rehearsal with the Lunds tonight and a gig on Friday at the Sunset. Next Saturday, I'm playing my first gig with the Scheme at the Skylark. In addition, my old friend Emilio is also playing that gig and needed a bassist, so I told him I'd do it.

Not much else to report. Riley has his surgery in a few weeks, the in-laws come in as well. Holidays coming up, of course, and Dad's not here. We'll see how that goes. I saw a HUGE spider in Mom's house the other day. Before taking care of it (humanely!), I asked Mom if it was Dad coming back to check on us. She said no, so I got the big plastic cup and tried to get the spider in the cup.

Only, when I got close to the spider, it moved and I put the edge of the cup right on the spider. Ugh. I didn't sever it, but it was stunned or dead. Now, it's sleepin' with the fishes.

I hate spiders. Can't stand 'em!

This and that

Not much new to report. I worked out tonight for the first time in probably 2-3 months. Felt it too. I was so good for the first part of the year. Then we went on vacation and summer hit and I really slacked off.

We went and bought a blood pressure device and apparently my readings are a little high. The doctor said it's not terribly serious, but for my age, it could come down just a tiny bit. Exercise and eating habits are what needs changing the most, so exercise begins again.

I have a show booked for the Lunds for 10/17. I expect to see you all there. It's a Friday and it's at the Sunset. Trouble is, I can't seem to get any other bands to play it. Luckily it's not because they don't want to, it's that a bunch of band members are going out of town or playing other shows. I've asked the about 5 bands and they've all said no. So I have 2 feelers out to bands we've never played with and am anxiously awaiting their responses.

It's also been a long time since I rock and rolled. I played with the Lunds last Monday. Scheme practice was canceled last Thursday. Sean called of LB practice last night. I should have Scheme practice this Thursday. LB is off next Monday. Sheesh. I just want to play bass!

Haley has been hit and miss since Sunday's post. She's been good and she's been horrible. It's been frustrating and I'm trying so hard to be patient with her. It's tough.

She has been rockin' the Rock Band mic, though. That's been fun to do. In fact, both Haley and Rye love to play Rock Band with me. Heck, even Marci did when the family was over. I'll have to get my little family to join in one of these days.

What else, what else?

I guess that's it for now. Still obsessed with this little BlackBerry thing. It's got a steep learning curve, but dang, it's cool. iPhone what???

Off to bed now. Goodnight.

I am going to blow a gasket

Here is a conversation I have with Haley on a daily basis.

Haley: "I'm tired."
Gwon: "Go to bed."
H: "I can't."
G: "Why not?"
H: "I don't want to."

Right now, it's 9:00pm. We put her to bed at 7:15. She was up at 8 and didn't rest. She is fall down exhausted right now and is refusing to go to sleep. I have taken away her radio and her night light; she was complaining that her room was too loud and too bright. Now she's complaining that it's too dark and that she can't sleep without music.

She is beside herself. She's sobbing and exhausted. She had a GREAT day today. Much better than yesterday where she was in trouble for being rude and mean. Today, she listened, played well and was the good ol' Haley we all know and love.

I understand she's only 6. I understand she's tired. But we've told her EVERY DAY that being tired, hungry or otherwise is no excuse for being rude and demanding.

I'm afraid that we're going to give her a complex as she gets older that she can't say anything to us or be herself around us. We have no idea where she gets this kind of behavior from. Marci and I have fought in front of the kids, but this lack of respect or ability to mind her parents is infuriating.

It's not so much that she's "bad", per se, but it's more the fact that she doesn't get that Marci and I are the parents and she is the child. Every day she is demanding us to do something for her. We tell her that it's not ok to talk like that and she gets that, but there is a disconnect somewhere. It's like she doesn't think before she speaks or does something.

I get so frustrated because I went through this with Riley. I fought and fought with him and, one day, something clicked with him and now he and I are all good. Haley and I are good half the time; the other half, it's fighting and me saying stuff that I hate myself for saying.

She's locked in her room now, sobbing for us and unable to sleep. Now it's probably out of anger and sadness, more than insomnia. Before, it was her not closing her eyes because she "couldn't". It's stuff like that that drives me crazy.

I just have to remind myself that she's only 6 and I have 30 years on her. I should be able to control my temper and be patient with her, but damn it can be tough.

Knock on wood, she seems to be quieting down. I was just about to go extend an olive branch, but if she's asleep finally, I'll leave her be until later.

Marci met with Haley's school counselor about grief/transitions, and the counselor gave us a bunch of things to read about it. One thing the material mentioned was a possible regression in behavior. Maybe this is that? Who knows.

Hopefully the next time I blog about Haley it's regarding something fun, like the fact that she loves to sing when Riley and I play Rock Band. Who knew?

This and that

I hate that Dad is gone. I hate it when I'm doing something, focused on it, then stop. And then remember that Dad is gone.

Not crying anymore, so I guess that's good. Just reminiscing now.

Haley had a rough morning. The week finally caught up to her. It's kind of unfair to expect a 6 year old to start school (after expecting to start 2 weeks prior), deal with a death in the family, go to a funeral of said loved one, and see her parents cry, all in the span of a few days. She was exhausted and spent by tonight. We put her in bed without brushing her teeth.

I'm feeling a little guilty getting on with my life. I had band practice last night. Tonight I'm going to watch some TV. My brother, on the other hand, is at Mom's right now. She's pretty much told us to get on with our own things, but we still need to get her settled. Today's the first day I haven't seen her since Dad passed. We'll go see her tomorrow.

I think I'm most bothered by the fact that Dad should've lived 20 to 25 more years, if not for the cancer. I know it's neither here or there at this point, but, motherjumper, I feel cheated by that. It's a damn shame, is what it is. I just hope the other parents in the family can take the initiative to get themselves healthy, if not for themselves, but for the grandkids.

I miss you, Dad. Why'd you have to be so stubborn???

In a rut

I'm uninspired to blog. Now that you've stopped applauding, I'll continue.

Not sure what it is. I get ideas, then I get lazy and don't feel like typing. So I'll just type.

Haley lost her first tooth yesterday. She's had a loose tooth for what seems like forever. The tooth behind it is popping in and we were getting a little concerned as the dentist has told us that her teeth are crammed in there supertight. She was wobbling it around yesterday and, poof, out it came. I'll have to put up a picture of Gap-Toothed Haley soon.

The teachers are on strike so Haley and Rye aren't going to school anytime soon. That's put a monkeywrench in things as it delays the start of the school routine, but, I suppose it's just bonus summer vacation at this point.

Haven't been playing music much lately. The Lunds have been on extended break. First it was a vacation, then a birthday, then a concert. We'll hook up next week, and then probably take another week off as it's Marci and my 8th anniversary. Yow.

All quiet on the Riley front lately. It's just a countdown for now. Keep an eye on his blog for updates.

Wow. How inspired was that?

School starting

Marci and I went to Haley's new school orientation thing last night. It was important because the school is brand spankin' new from the ground up. They tore down the old school that was on the site (where Marci and I used to work about 100 years ago) and built a new one on top of it.

It was kind of cool to see this place, even though they aren't done with it yet. They're putting on finishing touches and, with any luck, school will start on 9/2 (and that's provided that the teachers don't go on strike).

As we're sitting there last night, the 1st grade and kindergarten teachers all introduced themselves. One of them was assigned to talk about how the parents should leave their kids at the classrooms. That was all well and good, since it's new to all of us.

She then went on about how she's going to leave her kindergartener and, evidently, has a script all set to go. I couldn't believe how contrived and silly it sounded.

"OK, [insert name here], Mommy's staying for 6 minutes. Now, I know you're going to have a great day and I can't wait to hear about it. Here's your desk and where you'll be sitting."

"Mommy has 1 minute left, then she's going to have to go, but you are going to do so well today and it's going to be fun!"

I paraphrased, but you get the picture. It was really lame. And this is her second child! I'd think that after sending one to K, that sending the second one wouldn't be so tricky.

Anyway, we'll see how the transitions go next week. If they're anything like they've been this week (Marci's been getting Haley up early to get ready), well, we're in for a long year.

Still here, don't worry.

As if anyone was...

Not much is new since last week. It's rained a whole lot. There was lightning and thunder tonight. In the sky, that is.

I've started working out again. Doing a different ON Demand work out, this time with a ball and cardio. It's pretty cool. I hope to be in swimsuit shape for next season.

I'm sorely missing playing bass. The Lunds have been on a break with summer and all, and the Scheme is still just once a week or so. I hope to have some shows soon with the Lunds, but none of the clubs have gotten back to me yet.

Football is starting and that is AWESOME. I just finished watching SEA vs SD and, despite the result, I was encouraged by the play of Charlie Frye and our running game. Bring on the regular season!

I've also joined a fantasy football league. I have no idea what I'm doing. My team is the Invisible Sandwiches, so beware.

Haley is gearing up for school next week. Her school is brand new, from the ground up. They are still working on building it as we speak. They should be ready, for the most part, by next week. There's rumors flying around that the teachers may strike, so I guess we'll see what happens with that.

Speaking of Hairley, she's been quite the gem the past few weeks. Her brattiness appears to be a thing of the past, so much so that when she is a brat, I'm really thrown for a loop. She's back to the girl I know and love and that is so good for me. She does start her school routine, though, and that may make it a huge mess. Ask me again next week.

In breaking news, Marci just got home from the store and presented me with a...

PED EGG! For Men! I'm gonna give myself a pedicure! SO Fabulous!

Oh yeah!

All this complaining about Haley I've done? Well, I'm hoping it's a thing of the past. Since she's been home, she hasn't been perfect, but she has been great. She's been back to the Haley we all know and love.

Marci and I are gonna work on charting Haley's eating, resting/sleeping habits and moods. We think they're all linked. With some notes, we're hoping to get a grasp on the mood swings.

For now, I think it's helping tremendously that she's home and in a place where there's room to play and be a kid. Down in CA, the space we had was limited and it wasn't the most kid-friendly place around either.

So, in a nutshell, she's doing great. Thought you'd all like to know.