Friday, July 14, 2006

Garage Sale Grinch

A few years ago, just before Riley was born, we had a garage sale. Marci was pregnant and we spent a week getting ready and prepping for the weekend. Come the weekend, it was pretty slow. Not a lot of action. At lunch, I headed for Subway and noticed some of our signs were missing. I figured wind knocked 'em down or something.

A few weeks after that, we had a second sale, this time combined with some friends up the street. We put an ad in the paper and made more signs and attached them to utility poles and stop signs. This time we had lots of people (more from the ad than anything else). Once again, I headed out for lunch and coming down the hill, I saw this old man taking our signs off the stop sign. I stomped on it.

"Excuse me!"

No response.

"SIR. Excuse me! Those are our signs!"

He continued walking to his car, signs in hand. He got in his car, but not before I blocked it in with mine. I approached his window and asked him what was up, but before he could answer, I put a cap in his ass.

Actually, he came out and started going on about how utility poles and stop signs aren't public property, therefore no private signs should be on them. I told him he was ruining peoples' weekends and really being an a-hole. He had a stack of signs on his front seat. He claimed he was a volunteer for the city and for each sign he turned in, a fine was sent out to the sign creator.

He finally did give me back my signs and we parted ways, but not before I memorized his license plate (662-RVD).

I called the city a few days later and relayed my story, especially about the part of him being a city "volunteer". Turns out, we didn't have any volunteers in my neighborhood, so the city guy was quite concerned about it. He ran the guy's plate to be sure about names and stuff. He even got the police involved a few days later as the guy taking our signs was taking property that wasn't his. Apparently I could've pressed charges, but I decided not to.

So today, in preparation for our garage sale tomorrow, Marci and her 8.5 month pregnant friend Erin went around the 'hood putting up signs. One hour later I get a call saying that of the 7 or 8 signs they put up, 6 are gone. Boy were they pissed. I was pretty upset too. Trouble is, we don't know who's doing it this time, if it's the same old man or someone else (we live in a neighborhood populated with oldsters, most of which are cool, but some of which are PRICKS).

Anyway, I made up more signs tonight and will put them up at 7:30 or so tomorrow morning. I also made up notes attached to each sign basically telling the culprit to back off and that we'll remove them by the end of the day. I guess we'll see what happens. Hopefully I'll catch him in the act again...

WWJBD?? What would Jack Bauer do???